Can You Spot A Narcissistic Sociopath?

Welcome to another one of my dating stories from hell! Another reason as to why you should be careful with online dating, you never know who you’re talking to. This story starts with me talking to this guy, who I’ll call “Matt” on Tinder. He was extremely attractive, to the point where I thought he was out of my league. Nothing raised red flags on his profile except for the fact he didn’t have a bio (many guys don’t put bios on Tinder for some reason). We talked for a short amount of time (less than a week) before he asked if we could be exclusive. We didn’t even meet yet at that point and I was extremely creeped out. Ignoring my better judgement, I allowed him to eventually pick me up at my house and take us out (huge mistake!). We stayed in pretty frequent contact for a month before I cut things off. Some of the things said and done to me were the craziest things I’ve ever experienced from a guy:

  • He wanted to get me pregnant immediately

  • He wanted to make things official the first day of talking online

  • He wanted to own me (he actually said that to me)

  • He tried telling me what to wear

  • He demanded sex and would get extremely upset if I refused which was pretty much all the time

  • He was happy I wasn’t on birth control

  • He was a manipulator (he would make things seem like it was my fault all the time)

  • He wanted me to get a house with him ASAP

  • He would continually text me if I didn’t answer ASAP and get extremely upset

  • Though he asked to be exclusive, I caught him on Tinder

You may be thinking that the list above couldn’t possibly be true…but it is, which is the scary part. Things literally went from 0 to 100 in a matter of days. The most concerning part was how he tried to get me pregnant, which I believe was to trap me with him. Everything was about him, he didn’t care how I felt about anything. I honestly don’t know why I tolerated him for even a month, possibly boredom I guess. I also believed that since he was in his late 20’s that maybe it was normal for him to want to settle down ASAP.

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So what’s a narcissist? A narcissist is a person who believes that they’re God’s greatest gift on Earth. What’s a sociopath? A sociopath is a person who doesn’t have many emotions. They play with people and do manipulative things without any remorse. The combination of the two is pretty deadly as in my case: An extremely attractive person who is extremely manipulative, unforgiving and controlling. At first you may be flattered with all the attention they give you (like I felt) but then it quickly becomes overwhelming. I actually feared for my life at one point because he knew where I lived and I rejected him harshly. I threatened to get the police involved if he didn’t stop communicating with me and he still did, though he eventually stopped 2 months later. It can be hard not to fall for sweet talk when it’s happening to you, yet when looking on someone else’s situation you wonder why they didn’t just leave. I still wonder if he’ll ever show up to my house one day. I wouldn’t say I’m completely scared just more alert of my surroundings around my house. I also can’t help but think what could’ve happened if I stayed with him. I feel extremely blessed in that aspect.

You can check out the article below for a more professional take on what I talked about. This is the actual article I sent him to tell him I knew that he was controlling me. His reaction? He told me I was wasting his time and he never opened it. If you spot any of these signs, get out immediately!

Power and Control Phases of Narcissistic Relationships

More links below:

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/antisocial-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20353928

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20366662